Expression: The Message Beneath the Surface

Expression: The Message Beneath the Surface

 For much of my life, when I was upset or overwhelmed, I’d go quiet.

People around me could tell something was wrong, not because I said anything, but because of what I didn’t say. My silence was my expression.

 At the time, I didn’t realise that going quiet was a coping strategy. I didn’t have the tools or language to express what I was feeling. I wasn’t trying to shut people out; it was just the only way I knew to deal with discomfort or confusion of not knowing what to communicate.

What changed?

It started with self-awareness.

Through tools like CliftonStrengths and values clarification, I began to better understand what was happening internally and why I reacted that way. I became more intentional about noticing why I reacted the way I did, and how it impacted those around me.

I learned to ask better questions, of myself and others.

Expression isn’t just verbal. It’s posture. It’s presence. It’s the tone of your yes and the hesitation in your no. Most importantly, it’s something we can develop.

The more aware we become of how we express ourselves, the more clearly others can understand and connect with us. That’s the power of healthy communication, it begins not with words, but with awareness.

Takeaway Thought:

What you express is always communicating something, even in silence.

The question to think about is: Are you aware of what your expression is saying?

3 Ways to Grow in Self-Expression:

• Pause and Reflect: Before reacting, take a moment to ask, “What am I really feeling?” Naming the emotion creates space for better expression.

• Check in with Others: If you tend to withdraw or shut down, tell the people around you. A simple, “I need a moment to gather my thoughts,” can bring clarity instead of confusion.

• Practice Emotional Vocabulary: Build a better emotional vocabulary to express what’s really going on, beyond “fine” or “stressed.”

"The most important thing in communication is hearing what isn’t said."— Peter Drucker

I still have times where I default back to old ways, however, I don’t stay there long.

Reach Out, and let's take time to discover how we can progress together.

Remember daily to, 'Find value in your influence.' Your voice matters, and I'm excited to hear from and work with you!"

Written By: Paul Fawcett.